My advice to novice writers is to just keep writing. I mean look at me, I’ve been writing for over a decade, and I’ve already written four sentences. So, yeah, I’m prolific.

2019/04/212019/04/21 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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As a portrait artist, I’m the best at handling chopsticks while drawing, and for ONLY $19.95 I can draw you in such a way that no matter what you look like, you’ll resemble Rasputin. You’ll also look like a love letter, so you’ll have the essence of romance.

2019/04/152019/04/15 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Writing would have more vibrancy if instead of ink, pens were filled with coffee.

2019/04/15 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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I dance like I play the piano, and by that I mean when you watch my feet move you’d think I have 88 fingers. If you want to be a better lover, there’s a book for that, and I wrote it. You can read it, for ONLY $19.95.

2019/03/182019/03/18 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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When I write my autobiography, it will be a cookbook called “4,321 Ways To Eat Leftover Meatloaf.” The only two unifying elements, besides the Leftover Meatloaf, will the blindfold and the clothespin, to plug your nose. The book’s suggested retail price will be $19.95.

2019/03/142019/03/14 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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As Masters of The Fondle, TSA agents are so romantic that if they weren’t getting paid to grope travelers, they’d all probably be sitting at home writing Love Poetry in the style of Allen Ginsberg, that rambler for NAMBLA.

2019/01/292019/01/29 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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It’s too late to start fighting after you’ve been knocked out and enslaved. How long will you let The Globalists keep punching you before you start swinging back?

2019/01/122019/01/12 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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This GIF looks like a guy hiring his own clone, which is smart, because you can’t do everything, and so you must delegate, and if you are too busy to do something, who better to do it than you? Of course, you’ll probably get murdered by your clone, and he’ll just take your job.

2018/09/152018/09/15 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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There’s a fine line between advertising and dank meme marketing, and Nike just found itself on the wrong side, promoting a shill in a fake-woke campaign, while Truthers have remixed that ad to skewer globalists in a merciless and most humorous manner.

2018/09/052018/09/05 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Danny’s Coffee may be cold and old, but that doesn’t mean it’s not FOR SALE. Danny doesn’t know what he’s missing! Seriously, Danny has no idea I swiped his coffee, so all of it can be yours today! It’s just one haggle away!

2018/08/232018/08/23 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

Tag: write

My advice to novice writers is to just keep writing. I mean look at me, I’ve been writing for over a decade, and I’ve already written four sentences. So, yeah, I’m prolific.

Like this:

As a portrait artist, I’m the best at handling chopsticks while drawing, and for ONLY $19.95 I can draw you in such a way that no matter what you look like, you’ll resemble Rasputin. You’ll also look like a love letter, so you’ll have the essence of romance.

Like this:

Writing would have more vibrancy if instead of ink, pens were filled with coffee.

Like this:

I dance like I play the piano, and by that I mean when you watch my feet move you’d think I have 88 fingers. If you want to be a better lover, there’s a book for that, and I wrote it. You can read it, for ONLY $19.95.

Like this:

When I write my autobiography, it will be a cookbook called “4,321 Ways To Eat Leftover Meatloaf.” The only two unifying elements, besides the Leftover Meatloaf, will the blindfold and the clothespin, to plug your nose. The book’s suggested retail price will be $19.95.

Like this:

As Masters of The Fondle, TSA agents are so romantic that if they weren’t getting paid to grope travelers, they’d all probably be sitting at home writing Love Poetry in the style of Allen Ginsberg, that rambler for NAMBLA.

Like this:

It’s too late to start fighting after you’ve been knocked out and enslaved. How long will you let The Globalists keep punching you before you start swinging back?

Like this:

This GIF looks like a guy hiring his own clone, which is smart, because you can’t do everything, and so you must delegate, and if you are too busy to do something, who better to do it than you? Of course, you’ll probably get murdered by your clone, and he’ll just take your job.

Like this:

There’s a fine line between advertising and dank meme marketing, and Nike just found itself on the wrong side, promoting a shill in a fake-woke campaign, while Truthers have remixed that ad to skewer globalists in a merciless and most humorous manner.

Like this:

Danny’s Coffee may be cold and old, but that doesn’t mean it’s not FOR SALE. Danny doesn’t know what he’s missing! Seriously, Danny has no idea I swiped his coffee, so all of it can be yours today! It’s just one haggle away!

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