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Tag: treasure

Every Friday The Thirteenth I celebrate Knights Templar Day. I’ve got THE authentic map that details the location of their hidden treasure, and I’ll sell it to you for ONLY $19.95. (Limit one per customer.)

2020/04/212020/04/21 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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No sunken treasure to be found here.

2020/03/032020/03/03 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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If you and I actually do find The Lost Treasure of Jesse James, we’ll split it fairly 50/50/50/50/50, with you getting half of half, and me getting the other half and half of half.

2019/04/112019/04/11 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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I snuck a peak at the opening line of Jeremy’s Romance Novel, and it reads thus: “Our hero’s name is Jarod, and women want to be with him, men want to be him, and genderfluids want him to drink them.”

2019/03/172019/03/17 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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I spoke with the world’s leading heart specialist, Dr. Corazonamor, and he told me that no blood flows through my Love Pump, but that my body’s circulatory system is pulsing entirely with coffee.

2019/03/022019/03/02 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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The Search for The Lost Treasure of Jesse James is the ONLY Branson attraction where you spend money for the chance to make money. It could be the easiest way to swim in cash without waiting for inflation to make you into both a millionaire and a peasant.

2019/02/222019/02/22 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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After Wendell’s daring performance, if he should somehow survive, and that is a big IF for such a reasonable ticket price, join us as Wendell leads us in The Search for The Lost Treasure of Jesse James. Metal detector rentals ONLY $19.95.

2019/01/312019/01/31 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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I was born a salesman, and I was born after the promotional date, so I hope my mom got me for 50% OFF. I do know I was Buy One, Get One FREE, which is odd because I don’t have a twin, and that’s why I’m so extra.

2019/01/212019/01/21 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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I spend all my time searching for True Love, and when I find it, I will have found the greatest treasure. But in the meantime, it couldn’t hurt if I also looked for buried gold and silver.

2019/01/202019/01/20 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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She moves smooth like the fog glides down the hills of The Ozarks, and each step is filled with romance and mystery, and all my heart wants to do is explore her hidden treasure.

2018/12/112018/12/11 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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