People from Kansas drive as slow as corn grows. They think just as quickly, too, and I recommend a conversation with a tourist from there as a natural sleep remedy.
Tag: tourists
Sorry folks, Branson is CLOSED for cleaning. We apologize for the inconvenience. If you’ll take a seat on the hard, wooden bench, we should be open again by the year 2030.
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First Disneyland temporarily closed, and I wonder if next The Circus will be permanently shut down. Oh, it would be a shame if Branson abolished The Chamber of Commerce.
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How can I convey how much conveyor belts in factories are needed when a town’s only industry is tourism? If you want to make progress, you have to actually make something.
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I tried telling her, but she wouldn’t listen. I tried showing her, but she refused to see. I asked her what she thought, and she refused to say. That was the last time I ever spoke to Helen Keller.
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The chart of Branson, Missouri on Google Trends from 2004 until today looks like a regular heartbeat. That’s the look of tourism having a stroke in the future.
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I was just thinking to myself, “Branson doesn’t have enough obese 80-year-old tourists, and to really be vibrant into the future, we need MORE of those types of visitors.”
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When people ask me, “Why are you so weird?” I like to reply, “Why isn’t Duck Soup made with frogs?” It’s a good question, because I’ll bet Fried Duck Soup would jump right off the menu.
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The best part about taking a two-week vacation in Branson is you’ll spend 12 of the 14 days stuck behind one Buick from Kansas driving as fast as a push lawnmower.
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My heart is shaped like a strawberry, and when it’s full of your lemonade-flavored love it’s probably something that Branson tourists would pay $19.95 to sip on in the hot summer. I’m hoping you’ll supply me with FREE refills.
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