Today a guy asked me who’s the US President, and I looked at him like he was crazy before replying, “Desmond is Amazing.” He just stared blankly so I quickly added, “Wait, what time is it? I just got back from the year 2050, so that’s why I have a shopping cart full of bananas.”

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One cool thing about having visited The Future is I already know who wins every Presidential election. In 2020 and 2024 the winner is The Banksters. There is no election in 2028, as WWIII has destroyed everything in this country except one lone tourist in Branson, driving 15 MPH.

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Sometimes I long for the good old days, like the ones between the years 2033 through 2039. The crowd gathered outside my house and chanted, “The bees are dead! You killed all the bees!” And they repeated that until one guy got stung, and then they apologized and left my yard.

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