Just when you thought I couldn’t get any more romantic, I go and prove I’m 1920s Paris personified. Tickets can be found in the back pages of Joyce’s Ulysses.

2020/03/152020/03/15 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

giphy-17

Hand fishing in Branson is now FREE! Tickets are ONLY $19.95! And if you buy NOW, I’ll even include a complimentary dictionary.

2020/03/152020/03/15 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

giphy-15

Laws are written, and laws are re-written. I can’t believe I still got a speeding ticket after explaining to the cop that where I’m from, the year 2244, the Speed Limit is 88 miles per hour, which is exactly how fast I was going when I passed by his radar gun.

2020/03/102020/03/10 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

giphy-8

I’m learning to play the trumpet one string at a time. I wish this whole experience was microwavable, because it’s frozen and taking forever in the oven.

2020/01/012020/01/01 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

giphy-2

Selling tickets is easy when what people are buying is EXCITEMENT. People leave their farms and travel to Branson for one reason only: To pay to gaze at tractors.

2020/01/012020/01/01 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

giphy

The Search for The Lost Treasure of Jesse James is the ONLY Branson attraction where you spend money for the chance to make money. It could be the easiest way to swim in cash without waiting for inflation to make you into both a millionaire and a peasant.

2019/02/222019/02/22 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

I don’t have much to offer you, other than A Love Of A Lifetime. At ONLY $19.95, you can try to shop around, but NOBODY will beat that price. But if you act before February 14th, you’ll get this incredible deal at Buy One, Get One FREE!

2019/02/112019/02/11 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

giphy-21

To me, making love is performance art, and right now if you’d like to see a masterpiece, tickets are just $10 bucks at the window.

2019/02/062019/02/06 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

giphy-12

The worst part about selling #TornadoRidingSaddles is there are no repeat customers. Fortunately, there are a lot of people willing to waste their money and their life. My target market consists entirely of people who are pro sports season ticket holders.

2018/09/032018/09/03 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

giphy4

Our love is too big for us to selfishly try to hoard it all to ourselves, and that’s why I think we should sell the excess to eager customers who all want what we have.

2018/08/302018/08/30 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

giphy39

Tag: tickets

Just when you thought I couldn’t get any more romantic, I go and prove I’m 1920s Paris personified. Tickets can be found in the back pages of Joyce’s Ulysses.

Like this:

Hand fishing in Branson is now FREE! Tickets are ONLY $19.95! And if you buy NOW, I’ll even include a complimentary dictionary.

Like this:

Laws are written, and laws are re-written. I can’t believe I still got a speeding ticket after explaining to the cop that where I’m from, the year 2244, the Speed Limit is 88 miles per hour, which is exactly how fast I was going when I passed by his radar gun.

Like this:

I’m learning to play the trumpet one string at a time. I wish this whole experience was microwavable, because it’s frozen and taking forever in the oven.

Like this:

Selling tickets is easy when what people are buying is EXCITEMENT. People leave their farms and travel to Branson for one reason only: To pay to gaze at tractors.

Like this:

The Search for The Lost Treasure of Jesse James is the ONLY Branson attraction where you spend money for the chance to make money. It could be the easiest way to swim in cash without waiting for inflation to make you into both a millionaire and a peasant.

Like this:

I don’t have much to offer you, other than A Love Of A Lifetime. At ONLY $19.95, you can try to shop around, but NOBODY will beat that price. But if you act before February 14th, you’ll get this incredible deal at Buy One, Get One FREE!

Like this:

To me, making love is performance art, and right now if you’d like to see a masterpiece, tickets are just $10 bucks at the window.

Like this:

The worst part about selling #TornadoRidingSaddles is there are no repeat customers. Fortunately, there are a lot of people willing to waste their money and their life. My target market consists entirely of people who are pro sports season ticket holders.

Like this:

Our love is too big for us to selfishly try to hoard it all to ourselves, and that’s why I think we should sell the excess to eager customers who all want what we have.

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this: