This #ad is #sponsored by The Piano Movers Association of America, and NOT by Absolut Vodka, because they won’t return my calls or respond to my demands to be paid for services rendered.

2019/05/102019/05/10 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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This is an innovative class, because you pay me $19.95, and in return I teach you nothing. But in doing so, I teach you everything, so I think it’s a deal and you’ll really get your money’s worth. Sign up today!

2019/05/012019/05/01 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Have you ever stepped on a Lego? Well, you know that jerky movement your legs do, with an accompanying torso contortion? I can teach you how to dance like that without the pain stimulus that prompted that stylish motion. And my Dancing Lessons are now in liquid format!

2019/04/112019/04/11 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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I’m also offering Painting Classes. Paint like a master by painting over masterpieces. Improve on The Mona Lisa by adding a mustache, you creative genius. $19.95 per session.

2019/02/032019/02/03 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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I learned to draw the old-fashioned way—while not paying attention in math class. Let me teach you the art born of boredom and distraction.

2019/01/262019/01/26 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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I sell Sex Appeal In A Cup in small, medium, and large sizes. The cups are identical in volume, and the refills are FREE, but they’ll make your lover thirst for you like coffee.

2019/01/072019/01/07 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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I can teach you how to dance, but I can’t teach you how to be sexy. Well, I mean I can, but it’ll cost you an additional $19.95.

2019/01/072019/01/07 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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After you buy my Dancing Lessons In A Box, and before you leave a one-star product review on Amazon, you should remember that the box only appears to be empty, but it is in fact full of my love for you.

2019/01/072019/01/07 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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My Dancing Lessons In A Box are completely SOLD OUT. I’m waiting for more cardboard to come in, so you should Pre-Order yours today.

Tag: teacher

This #ad is #sponsored by The Piano Movers Association of America, and NOT by Absolut Vodka, because they won’t return my calls or respond to my demands to be paid for services rendered.

Like this:

This is an innovative class, because you pay me $19.95, and in return I teach you nothing. But in doing so, I teach you everything, so I think it’s a deal and you’ll really get your money’s worth. Sign up today!

Like this:

Have you ever stepped on a Lego? Well, you know that jerky movement your legs do, with an accompanying torso contortion? I can teach you how to dance like that without the pain stimulus that prompted that stylish motion. And my Dancing Lessons are now in liquid format!

Like this:

I’m also offering Painting Classes. Paint like a master by painting over masterpieces. Improve on The Mona Lisa by adding a mustache, you creative genius. $19.95 per session.

Like this:

I learned to draw the old-fashioned way—while not paying attention in math class. Let me teach you the art born of boredom and distraction.

Like this:

I sell Sex Appeal In A Cup in small, medium, and large sizes. The cups are identical in volume, and the refills are FREE, but they’ll make your lover thirst for you like coffee.

Like this:

I can teach you how to dance, but I can’t teach you how to be sexy. Well, I mean I can, but it’ll cost you an additional $19.95.

Like this:

After you buy my Dancing Lessons In A Box, and before you leave a one-star product review on Amazon, you should remember that the box only appears to be empty, but it is in fact full of my love for you.

Like this:

My Dancing Lessons In A Box are completely SOLD OUT. I’m waiting for more cardboard to come in, so you should Pre-Order yours today.

Like this:

Why are you so weird? Why can’t you just be perfectly normal like me?

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