Branson’s got more waterfalls per square mile than any other shape of measuring landmass. Next time, try circles! (Waterproof sticks sold separately.) 2020/02/272020/02/27 jarodkintz1Leave a comment Share this:EmailTweetShare on TumblrMorePrintPocketWhatsAppLike this:Like Loading... Share this:EmailTweetShare on TumblrMorePrintPocketWhatsAppLike this:Like Loading...
At April in The Ozarks, we try to be relatable, like an orphan at a family reunion. You should try the meatloaf. It tastes like 1991. 2020/02/242020/02/24 jarodkintz1Leave a comment Share this:EmailTweetShare on TumblrMorePrintPocketWhatsAppLike this:Like Loading... Share this:EmailTweetShare on TumblrMorePrintPocketWhatsAppLike this:Like Loading...
The problem with a birthday for twins is what you get one, you have to get the other. But what about triplets? The collapse of Building 7 may not look like the Twin Towers, but its father is still Israel. 2019/07/312019/07/31 jarodkintz1Leave a comment Share this:EmailTweetShare on TumblrMorePrintPocketWhatsAppLike this:Like Loading... Share this:EmailTweetShare on TumblrMorePrintPocketWhatsAppLike this:Like Loading...
You don’t have to be a gumshoe, or have gum on your shoe, to appreciate my Israel did 9/11-flavored gum, but once you experience this INCREDIBLE taste, you’ll want to start investigating The Truth. 2019/07/302019/07/30 jarodkintz1Leave a comment Share this:EmailTweetShare on TumblrMorePrintPocketWhatsAppLike this:Like Loading... Share this:EmailTweetShare on TumblrMorePrintPocketWhatsAppLike this:Like Loading...
In descending order, these are my favorite milkshake flavors: Mint chocolate chip, caramel, strawberry, and Israel did 9/11. 2019/07/272019/07/27 jarodkintz1Leave a comment Share this:EmailTweetShare on TumblrMorePrintPocketWhatsAppLike this:Like Loading... Share this:EmailTweetShare on TumblrMorePrintPocketWhatsAppLike this:Like Loading...
Even if you had acne scar pits like the lunar surface, NASA couldn’t land on your face. But I’d still like to see Ryan Gosling try, so you should probably buy my movie ticket or else I’m just gonna sneak in the theater after you pay. 2019/07/262019/07/26 jarodkintz1Leave a comment Share this:EmailTweetShare on TumblrMorePrintPocketWhatsAppLike this:Like Loading... Share this:EmailTweetShare on TumblrMorePrintPocketWhatsAppLike this:Like Loading...
When I say NO to Israel, I’m really saying YES to peace. 2019/07/052019/07/05 jarodkintz1Leave a comment Share this:EmailTweetShare on TumblrMorePrintPocketWhatsAppLike this:Like Loading... Share this:EmailTweetShare on TumblrMorePrintPocketWhatsAppLike this:Like Loading...
Who am I when I’m asleep? Dreams, they are who I am when I’m too tired to be me. 2019/07/05 jarodkintz1Leave a comment Share this:EmailTweetShare on TumblrMorePrintPocketWhatsAppLike this:Like Loading... Share this:EmailTweetShare on TumblrMorePrintPocketWhatsAppLike this:Like Loading...
Sometimes I long for the good old days, like the ones between the years 2033 through 2039. The crowd gathered outside my house and chanted, “The bees are dead! You killed all the bees!” And they repeated that until one guy got stung, and then they apologized and left my yard. 2019/07/052019/07/05 jarodkintz1Leave a comment Share this:EmailTweetShare on TumblrMorePrintPocketWhatsAppLike this:Like Loading... Share this:EmailTweetShare on TumblrMorePrintPocketWhatsAppLike this:Like Loading...
A broken clock is right twice a day—and that makes NOW the perfect time to buy one, because now when you Buy One Broken Clock, You Get FREE Fake Space! I buy Factory Direct from NASA, so you know my inventory is FRESH. 2019/03/072019/03/07 jarodkintz1Leave a comment Share this:EmailTweetShare on TumblrMorePrintPocketWhatsAppLike this:Like Loading... Share this:EmailTweetShare on TumblrMorePrintPocketWhatsAppLike this:Like Loading...