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Tag: scent

From honeysuckle to mint to pine, nothing smells fresher than sweet nostalgia. Well, nothing except for The Future, which is synonymous with April in The Ozarks.

2020/03/032020/03/03 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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My favorite part of The Art of War are all the commas. I mean, I guess that’s my favorite part, because I had my pet monkey read the book for me and summarize it using banana analogies.

2020/02/232020/02/23 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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I know a thing or thirteen about making soap. But so what? Am I the World’s Greatest Soap Maker? Actually, YES! And I have the trophy to prove it. It only cost me $19.95 from The Trophy Store.

2020/02/232020/02/23 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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When making soap, the most important ingredient I include is Time. What you smell now is not what you smelled then, or what you’ll smell later, and those small fluctuations, those tiny discrepancies, are the spaces occupied by nostalgia, as the mind works to fill in the gaps.

2020/02/232020/02/23 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Let an array of colors scent your essence, and may you flourish like flowers. When the winds of adversity batter you, may your reaction bring freshness to the breeze.

2020/02/152020/02/15 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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A firefly is flying fire, but is a butterfly flying butter? It should be called a flutterfly.

2020/02/152020/02/15 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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The best wave machine is a hurricane, and one time in high school I skipped classes to go surfing in one. As I was tumbling on the ocean floor while my lungs were screeching like a scratchy Beastie Boys song, I thought, “Hey, maybe math class wouldn’t be so bad right now.”

2020/02/152020/02/15 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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There is music in fragrance, and if you listen closely, it smells like nostalgia. Let it resonate deep within your soul.

2020/02/152020/02/15 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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This is a great idea that’s a terrible idea. Plus, if I made soap that was scented like petroleum, The US Military would invade my shower and kill me.

2020/01/312020/01/31 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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I play the trumpet like my cheeks are on fire, which is why I don’t play the trumpet. And I would make flame-scented soap, but I think shower water would extinguish its essence.

2020/01/242020/01/24 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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  • Dance critics all over the world have called my body moves, “Sculpturesque,” “As full of motion as a Rodin statue,” and “Like watching Helen Keller eat Jell-O with her elbows.” My dancing is so still and silent that it belongs on a shelf in a library, next to other great literature.
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