Did you even know the saxophone could make farm noises? You know I’m a genius jazz performer because it sounds like I haven’t played an instrument ever before.
Tag: saxophone
My pool may be empty, but I’m not going to cry about it, unless I use my tears to fill it up. If you’re not too busy, maybe you could help me. If you just think about all your failures, this thing should be overflowing in no time.
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Pele popularized the bicycle kick, but I created the unicycle kick. It’s like the bicycle kick, only it requires more balance and one less wheel. It’s best viewed when the scent of freshly cut grass is on the breeze, and soft jazz saxophone is playing in the background.
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The way Bitcoin tanks, you’d think it was a War Machine. Of course, that’s ridiculous, because if it had rolling treads and a swiveling cannon, it would be more peaceful. If you’re looking for the investment of The Future, try raising farm animals.
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As far as musicians go, Seal is my favorite. But not the Seal that looks like his face has been gored by a Great White Shark who sang in the 90s. No, I’m talking about the watery JazzSax virtuoso.
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I love the sound of fall leaves crunching under my feet as I walk on them. But wait, those are potato chips, my football helmet is full of nacho cheese, and this is winter. Shop #BearPawDuckAndMemeFarm for a smorgasbord of assorted tasty ear treats.
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I make serious memes for serious people. I also make other things, including money, and everything is FOR SALE. Everything MUST GO.
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I make love like I make coffee. That’s why if you buy right now, you get FREE refills for life. (Limited to one customer only. Promotion not valid in the following states: Alaska and Hawaii.)
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Liquid xylophone music with a hint of saxophone is too exotic and sexy to taste test right now. I’ll have to wait until the world is ready for that level of experiential retail, but once it goes live, after the samples get canned, I predict a baby boom.
