Rocky 4 is #1, and while Rocky is Rocky 1, it’s still #2. Rocky 2 is somewhere in the middle, like the year 1212. It’s time to take that time out of the freezer and reheat it in a volcano, like you’d do with any other leftovers.

2020/06/232020/06/23 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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I dance like my legs are made of Jell-O. I know, exotic and romantic, right? But my dancing also now comes in Duck Soup Flavor, and is FOR SALE in small, medium, and buffet-style.

2020/06/122020/06/12 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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I’m now selling Duck-Soup Popsicles in vintage meatloaf colors. The flavor of 1991 has never looked so good while camping. Just ask Bigfoot.

2020/05/012020/05/01 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Some people sleepwalk, but I sleeprun. The other night I breezed through a whole marathon. Good thing I was wearing my Nike Air Zoom Alphafly Next%s, because I was able to cover the distance in record time—without waking up my cat, who was curled up next to me the whole slumber.

2020/03/102020/03/10 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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I’m a bit of a marathon runner myself. I once ran for Class President, and I only lost by 26.2 miles. It was a tight race.

2020/01/012020/01/01 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Coffee makes you shit, but that doesn’t mean you should drink shitty coffee. Why buy a cup full of good coffee, when you could sip what I sell out of a diaper?

2019/12/132019/12/13 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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I once ran five miles an hour. It took me two hours to build up that kind of speed. I built it using 100% recycled material.

2019/12/102019/12/10 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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I was once walking in a field of sunflowers in Kansas, when suddenly one of them roared at me like a lion, and it wasn’t until the next moment that I realized that I run like an antelope when I’m feeling particularly brave.

2019/06/022019/06/02 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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I feel like I’m running a marathon on a treadmill, so while I’m covering an incredible distance, I’m also not going anywhere.

2019/05/032019/05/03 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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I’m also trying to get a shoe sponsorship, because why buy low and sell high when I don’t have to buy at all? #RethinkRetailArbitrage

2019/03/302019/03/30 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Tag: run

Rocky 4 is #1, and while Rocky is Rocky 1, it’s still #2. Rocky 2 is somewhere in the middle, like the year 1212. It’s time to take that time out of the freezer and reheat it in a volcano, like you’d do with any other leftovers.

Like this:

I dance like my legs are made of Jell-O. I know, exotic and romantic, right? But my dancing also now comes in Duck Soup Flavor, and is FOR SALE in small, medium, and buffet-style.

Like this:

I’m now selling Duck-Soup Popsicles in vintage meatloaf colors. The flavor of 1991 has never looked so good while camping. Just ask Bigfoot.

Like this:

Some people sleepwalk, but I sleeprun. The other night I breezed through a whole marathon. Good thing I was wearing my Nike Air Zoom Alphafly Next%s, because I was able to cover the distance in record time—without waking up my cat, who was curled up next to me the whole slumber.

Like this:

I’m a bit of a marathon runner myself. I once ran for Class President, and I only lost by 26.2 miles. It was a tight race.

Like this:

Coffee makes you shit, but that doesn’t mean you should drink shitty coffee. Why buy a cup full of good coffee, when you could sip what I sell out of a diaper?

Like this:

I once ran five miles an hour. It took me two hours to build up that kind of speed. I built it using 100% recycled material.

Like this:

I was once walking in a field of sunflowers in Kansas, when suddenly one of them roared at me like a lion, and it wasn’t until the next moment that I realized that I run like an antelope when I’m feeling particularly brave.

Like this:

I feel like I’m running a marathon on a treadmill, so while I’m covering an incredible distance, I’m also not going anywhere.

Like this:

I’m also trying to get a shoe sponsorship, because why buy low and sell high when I don’t have to buy at all? #RethinkRetailArbitrage

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