I just invented a way to put the smooth sounds of a saxophone directly into a trumpet—with little or minimal rusting. When you listen to my music, just close your eyes, because your mind is about to take a romantic trip—inside of a mental elevator.

2021/09/20 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

When you buy one of my T-shirts, you get a FREE spot of tea. I tried to wash it out, but the spot is now a stain, so if you are thirsty for deals then this is for you.

2021/08/30 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

I am The Helen Keller of Love. I can’t see or hear it coming, and I know whether love is blind or if it’s just deaf in the eyes, because I write romance poetry in Braille.

2021/06/02 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

I like my breakfast burritos at 7 PM, because I get out of bed 60 minutes earlier—and a full twelve hours before lazy roosters wake up. Do you slumber at midnight? What are you doing sleeping your life away?

2021/03/14 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

The essence or romance is mystery, and you already know whodunnit. It was Marie’s! They provide the food, music, and ambience to make this Valentine’s Day one to last all year.

2021/02/14 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

She makes my heart flutter like a butterfly, when before it was still like a rose, and so in return I bought her the most romantic gift ever: A used dishwasher. I would have bought her a new one, but babies splash around too much in the sink.

2020/12/18 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

Fellas, if your e-girl gets an OnlyFans account, the only way to prove that you love her is to continually give her more money than the other online guys trying to woo her with money. How much she loves you is a direct result of how much you pay her. Who said romance is dead?

2020/10/02 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

Of all the ways to say I love you, saying it in Cupcake is the most romantic. Just don’t try to say I love you with a mouthful of strawberry I love you.

2020/08/262020/08/26 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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I dance like my legs are made of Jell-O. I know, exotic and romantic, right? But my dancing also now comes in Duck Soup Flavor, and is FOR SALE in small, medium, and buffet-style.

2020/06/122020/06/12 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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I often just stop by Nature’s Wonders to buy an orange soda. Of course, they also sell other tasty flavors, like brown, light brown, and red brown.

2020/06/122020/06/12 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Tag: romantic

I just invented a way to put the smooth sounds of a saxophone directly into a trumpet—with little or minimal rusting. When you listen to my music, just close your eyes, because your mind is about to take a romantic trip—inside of a mental elevator.

Like this:

When you buy one of my T-shirts, you get a FREE spot of tea. I tried to wash it out, but the spot is now a stain, so if you are thirsty for deals then this is for you.

Like this:

I am The Helen Keller of Love. I can’t see or hear it coming, and I know whether love is blind or if it’s just deaf in the eyes, because I write romance poetry in Braille.

Like this:

I like my breakfast burritos at 7 PM, because I get out of bed 60 minutes earlier—and a full twelve hours before lazy roosters wake up. Do you slumber at midnight? What are you doing sleeping your life away?

Like this:

The essence or romance is mystery, and you already know whodunnit. It was Marie’s! They provide the food, music, and ambience to make this Valentine’s Day one to last all year.

Like this:

She makes my heart flutter like a butterfly, when before it was still like a rose, and so in return I bought her the most romantic gift ever: A used dishwasher. I would have bought her a new one, but babies splash around too much in the sink.

Like this:

Fellas, if your e-girl gets an OnlyFans account, the only way to prove that you love her is to continually give her more money than the other online guys trying to woo her with money. How much she loves you is a direct result of how much you pay her. Who said romance is dead?

Like this:

Of all the ways to say I love you, saying it in Cupcake is the most romantic. Just don’t try to say I love you with a mouthful of strawberry I love you.

Like this:

I dance like my legs are made of Jell-O. I know, exotic and romantic, right? But my dancing also now comes in Duck Soup Flavor, and is FOR SALE in small, medium, and buffet-style.

Like this:

I often just stop by Nature’s Wonders to buy an orange soda. Of course, they also sell other tasty flavors, like brown, light brown, and red brown.

Like this:

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