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Tag: rent

Do you enjoy being out in nature? By 2030, when you’re living in your 20 by 30 cement stacked box in the city, you’ll probably be able to rent walks in the park for ONLY $19.95 per month.

2022/11/24 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Do you find your living rental unit too cluttered? You should try post-minimalism and own no things. The people who own everything assure us that it will be great if we owned nothing.

2021/06/15 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Branson offers competitive wages. Its most comparable competitor is a city in China—the place where they have all those slave-labor factories making cheap Walmart products.

2020/08/192020/08/19 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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I may dance like two-thirds of the bottom half of a piano, but that doesn’t mean you can buy my Romantic Moves. However, they are FOR RENT at Truck Stop Diner Prices.

2020/03/292020/03/29 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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I also have other romantic items available FOR RENT, like my World Famous Leftover Meatloaf, though if you don’t return it in the same condition you rented it, I’m going to have to charge you $19.95.

2019/08/242019/08/24 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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I drive an exotic sports car, a 2011 Toyota Camry, so I’m a guy that appreciates speed and luxury, which is why I decided to start selling high-quantity goods at low-quality prices.

2019/02/262019/02/26 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Why make dinner, when it was just made last night and there is still some left over? Same thing with making love. If you’re horny, check the fridge.

2018/09/082018/09/08 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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When it rains, I often think about Noah, and how he had no room for his mother-in-law onboard his ark, and this makes me sad, because she could have slept with the pigs, and he could have gouged her on the rent.

2018/05/04 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Sales is hard work, trying to convince people to willingly exchange their money for a good or service. Oh, if only go around trading the threat of violence for real fake money, like the government does, I’d be so rich I wouldn’t care if I were universally despised.

2018/03/04 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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