Everything is better when flavored with Love. That’s why my prices are so high!
Did you know that Subway used the rubber found in yoga mats to make their bread? If you think that’s gross, wait until you find out about Beyond Meat! They don’t make food like they used to. That’s why I’m selling all your childhood favorites, pristinely preserved in Tupperware.
I like John Mayer’s song, “Waiting On The World To Change,” because in the middle of it he breaks into Elevator Music, which is designed to put people to sleep, so it allows the listener to take a MicroNap.
Makeup sex is amazing. Clowns wear lots of makeup, so perhaps I should mosey on down to the circus on this lonely Friday night.