It’s not that I don’t like buying things, it’s that I don’t like paying. But if you’re going to waste your money, you may as well spend it on me.
Tag: price
TODAY is the last day to take a tour of BearPaw Duck Farm—until TOMORROW. The ticket price today is $19.95, but with the way The Federal Reserve is printing fake money, tomorrow it may cost you ONE TRILLION DOLLARS. Just ask 2005 Zimbabwe.
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Ask me about my Tuesday Special. Or don’t, because I’ll just tell you. My SALE runs from Wednesday to Monday, which makes Tuesday special because you pay FULL PRICE!
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I now sell Waterfall Wedding Veils, because what’s more romantic than weddings and waterfalls? Only the LOW price of ONLY $19.95!
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And just for Buying One and Getting One FREE, you’ll also get the opportunity to buy a SECOND one for FREE for FULL PRICE. Act NOW before this deal grows fins and flies away.
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If I were a Bankster dad, I’d tell my boy to go out into the world and make money. But not with a digital printing press, because that’s neither honest nor money. In fact, that kind of business will eventually get you killed by a starving mob.
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A uniform is a costume, and a $9/hour security guard might as well be wearing a Mickey Mouse outfit.
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In my Warehouse of Romance I specialize in selling only two precious items: Love and Leftover Meatloaf. Both are vintage 1980s, so get them while they’re still cold.
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A Woman Of The Future might try to insult me and say I make love like a robot, all mechanical and without feeling, but I’ll take offense to that, because my prices will be much more affordable.
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These days, robots will do everything. They’ll do your job, they’ll take your paycheck, and they’ll even make love to you, for a price, which of course you can’t afford because a robot stole your income.
