I would VOTE for a vending machine, but I want to rid politics of prostitutes. If you want to have sex, you must use exact change ONLY!
The phone line is open, and I eagerly await your phone call so you can BUY what I’ve got FOR SALE. I just don’t know my phone number, so I’m afraid you’re going to have to try all the possibly combinations until I finally pick up. Leave a message if I don’t answer.
If I gave birth to myself, like some kind of hermaphroditic worm, would I be entitled to FREE food? This is an important issue that NO Presidential candidate has EVER mentioned.
Some people make weird memes, but as the Founder, President, and only member of Citizens For Serious Memes And Against Absurdity, I think that’s nonsense. Meetings for this prestigious Meme Culture Association are held every morning in my shower.
What I love most about power is that it’s so powerless it can be overcome and overthrown through voting. If we all just turn in enough slips of paper, they will turn over all their guns and stop their violence.
Today a guy asked me who’s the US President, and I looked at him like he was crazy before replying, “Desmond is Amazing.” He just stared blankly so I quickly added, “Wait, what time is it? I just got back from the year 2050, so that’s why I have a shopping cart full of bananas.”
One cool thing about having visited The Future is I already know who wins every Presidential election. In 2020 and 2024 the winner is The Banksters. There is no election in 2028, as WWIII has destroyed everything in this country except one lone tourist in Branson, driving 15 MPH.
Society decays in four-year chunks at a time, and it’s as if the more energy elections snatch, the faster the degradation occurs, which leads me to believe that voting works. Trump is going to break The System by continuing to inject corruption until The System purifies itself.
The fact that Trump hasn’t locked up any treasonous traitors, stopped the wars, or stomped out False Flag events designed to erase freedom simply means that he’s Our Champion, The Chosen One, and you must vote for him again. 2020 is about perfect vision while donning a blindfold.