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Tag: poison

Lies come in all sorts of flavors, while The Truth is always vanilla. However, while you can get a lie in any flavor you’d like, it is always camouflaged poison.

2020/09/26 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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I only call my new cologne The Scent of Silent Slaughter, and it only smells like bug killer, but it is in fact no more deadly than voting. (Try it on pancakes!)

2019/12/282019/12/28 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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A bootlicker would be so much wiser if he would simply hold his tongue. The tongue can be used in many foolish ways, like praising our oppressors, but the most foolish way to use your tongue is to be a bootlicker.

2019/12/282019/12/28 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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I just read that McDonald’s is trying to create a chicken sandwich to rival the one served by Popeyes. If they can come up with a product that gets certain customers to stab each other over it, then I’m all for it.

2019/12/112019/12/11 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Well, at least it still contains a sterilization drug, so I can continue to use it to decorate my Birkenstocks.

2019/10/312019/10/31 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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I only call my new cologne Insecticide, and it only smells like bug killer, but it is in fact no more deadly than voting. (Try it on pancakes!)

2019/09/132019/09/13 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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McDonald’s is The Pope of the food industry, and by that I mean it takes Evil and disguises it as something tantalizing to be obtained, to the detriment of your body and soul.

2018/08/292018/08/29 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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The thing I like most about politicians is the, um, the thing that, um, well, hmmm the, uh, the whatchacallit, the, um, um, well, I don’t know, but surely there must be a thing, just one thing to like about politicians.

2018/05/01 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Marijuana is a miracle medicinal plant, so it’s no surprise the government made it illegal, because Uncle Sam is there for The People, and should be trusted with your healthcare.

2018/01/26 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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We should call the push to vaccinate children what it really is: The War on Babies. Well, the babies that were lucky enough to not get slaughtered in abortion and sold off, body part by body part. America, we are all about war and shedding innocent blood.

2017/11/20 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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