In middle school I fought a fat bully, and his punches felt like he had pillows for fists. Too bad he hit like a nap, because I was the one that put him to sleep.
Tag: pillow fight
Combat is dangerous, and no matter if it’s Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu, Muay Thai, or grappling, no Octagon Warrior wants to get put to sleep by a Pillow Fighter. That’s why Dana White won’t sign me to a contract.
Share this:
Share this:
I once had a pet tornado, but Kansas asked me to stop walking it on its lawn. I was so offended that I spilled myself on my lunch and stained by BBQ sauce with my T-shirt. This design has the same fighting twist as my old cuddling companion, and is now FOR SALE.
Share this:
Share this:
The flavor of lemon is very punchy, and it hits you in the mouth like a boxer, which is why I drink it when I’m training for a fight. Of course, I do other things to prepare, like sitting on the grass watching my ducks squabble while I drink beer.
Share this:
Share this:
How do pillow makers sleep at night? Do they have no souls? How can pillow makers sleep knowing they make an Object of Violence that is involved in more fights than any other component of bedding?
Share this:
Share this:
Some people sleep with a gun under their pillow, and that is offensive. In an effort to ban all Objects Of Violence, I propose banning pillows, because they are the root cause of millions of fights, and without them, we’d have a more peaceful society. I hope you groggily agree.
jarodkintz.com 