I’ve been playing the piano since I was six years old. When I finish practicing tonight, in nine minutes, I will have put in a collective three hours mastering this instrument. If you’ve got a bowl full of Asian noodles, I’ve got the Chopsticks.
Tag: piano
I dance like both my shoes are nailed to the wall. It goes way beyond mere performance and into the realm of art. I am the Rodin of the music world.
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I may dance like two-thirds of the bottom half of a piano, but that doesn’t mean you can buy my Romantic Moves. However, they are FOR RENT at Truck Stop Diner Prices.
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Cats make cuddly pets, but you can’t take them for walks. That’s why I love my pet waterfall, which also makes the splashiest snuggles. However, cats are the superior jazz musicians.
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I remember this one time I remembered this one time. That was a good time. Also, that was a good time.
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If I close my eyes I can still hear the piano music, and if I stop my fingers from dancing, then the sound dissipates and disappears. This elevator just won’t be the same without her.
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A Woman Of The Future might try to insult me and say I make love like a robot, all mechanical and without feeling, but I’ll take offense to that, because my prices will be much more affordable.
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This #ad is #sponsored by The Piano Movers Association of America, and NOT by Absolut Vodka, because they won’t return my calls or respond to my demands to be paid for services rendered.
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My fried chicken is made from locally sourced materials, including, but not limited to: Formaldehyde, pink sludge, and perfume (to preserve that back-of-the-fridge stink, for the nostalgia factor).
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To hide inflation from my Dancing Lessons customers, I’ve decided to keep the price at $19.95, but dramatically and drastically reduce quantity and quality. Thanks for shopping.
jarodkintz.com 