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Love now, not later. Also, love later.

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Tag: photography

Now that nobody has any money or job, maybe people would pay me to print them income. Buy a $100 dollar bill for ONLY $19.95—or Five For Fifty dollars. (Fake, fake, fake money not an acceptable form of payment for fake, fake money.)

2020/04/212020/04/21 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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I now sell Waterfall Wedding Veils, because what’s more romantic than weddings and waterfalls? Only the LOW price of ONLY $19.95!

2020/03/172020/03/17 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Sometimes you buy too much and you regret it. Like buying a timeshare condo, or buying twelve donuts and actually getting thirteen. Are you serious, baker? I can only eat one dozen at one time. What’s with the extra one?

2019/12/102019/12/10 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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When I’m not making cakes, my hobbies include terrorizing trailer parks and being photographed by storm chasers.

2019/03/042019/03/04 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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I took this photo, but I didn’t take this photo. I took it from Google, and once I’m done promoting myself, I promise I’ll put it back.

2019/01/122019/01/12 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Are waterfalls the most romantic things in the world? You’d think so, but I actually dated one, and the truth is they only care about looking good, and they only want you around to fawn over them and take their picture all the time.

2018/08/202018/08/20 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Recent Posts

  • Here’s an idea: You blame me and I’ll blame you. Then we can both join Howard Jones in singing, “No one is to blame.”
  • Everyone is getting crazier. And poorer. Which is making everyone even crazier.
  • I once wrote a 100,000-word book. But don’t worry, I managed to edit it down to just over one million words.
  • A hundred dollars used to have value. Now it has grown fat and worthless. Or has it grown so skinny as to be useless?
  • If I were the world’s richest man, I’d present myself as the world’s poorest, because I’d want people to want me for me. In fact, I’m so poor I want to be Guinness verified as The World’s Poorest—and I’m even willing to pay for the title (a bribe).
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