Skip to content

Love now, not later. Also, love later.

  • Contact Me
  • About
  • My Books On Amazon

Tag: performance

I don’t know who you’d rather watch perform in Branson, the 1950s cover band at the theater, or the homeless guy with the guitar on the street corner, but either way I’ve got ear plugs in your size FOR SALE.

2019/12/102019/12/10 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

giphy-12

Share this:

  • Email
  • Tweet
  • Share on Tumblr
  • More
  • Print
  • Pocket
  • WhatsApp

Like this:

Like Loading...

Share this:

  • Email
  • Tweet
  • Share on Tumblr
  • More
  • Print
  • Pocket
  • WhatsApp

Like this:

Like Loading...

Your body is musically curved, like a Stradivarius, and you make me want to be a better concert performer. I do it for your affection, though the applause from the audience is always appreciated.

2019/11/262019/11/26 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

giphy-22

Share this:

  • Email
  • Tweet
  • Share on Tumblr
  • More
  • Print
  • Pocket
  • WhatsApp

Like this:

Like Loading...

Share this:

  • Email
  • Tweet
  • Share on Tumblr
  • More
  • Print
  • Pocket
  • WhatsApp

Like this:

Like Loading...

Autumn leaves go from green to brown, though orange, and that’s a gradient that’s great in the beginning and middle, but sad at the end, like fading love. I wish we could omit winter and summer, and just have a SpringFall kind of romance.

2019/09/302019/09/30 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

giphy-25

Share this:

  • Email
  • Tweet
  • Share on Tumblr
  • More
  • Print
  • Pocket
  • WhatsApp

Like this:

Like Loading...

Share this:

  • Email
  • Tweet
  • Share on Tumblr
  • More
  • Print
  • Pocket
  • WhatsApp

Like this:

Like Loading...

If you want to watch me perform, I’ll be at The Blue Green Turquoise Lounge. Ask for Denise. You’ll know she’s Denise because her nametag will say “Susan,” and she’ll be wearing a yellow leather sofa and a coffee table with FREE refills.

2019/05/082019/05/08 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

giphy-5

Share this:

  • Email
  • Tweet
  • Share on Tumblr
  • More
  • Print
  • Pocket
  • WhatsApp

Like this:

Like Loading...

Share this:

  • Email
  • Tweet
  • Share on Tumblr
  • More
  • Print
  • Pocket
  • WhatsApp

Like this:

Like Loading...

After Wendell’s daring performance, if he should somehow survive, and that is a big IF for such a reasonable ticket price, join us as Wendell leads us in The Search for The Lost Treasure of Jesse James. Metal detector rentals ONLY $19.95.

2019/01/312019/01/31 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

giphy-49

Share this:

  • Email
  • Tweet
  • Share on Tumblr
  • More
  • Print
  • Pocket
  • WhatsApp

Like this:

Like Loading...

Share this:

  • Email
  • Tweet
  • Share on Tumblr
  • More
  • Print
  • Pocket
  • WhatsApp

Like this:

Like Loading...

I know someone who died of a broken heart. At least that’s what I hope the autopsy report shows, because I don’t have an alibi for that person’s last moment on earth.

2018/12/032018/12/03 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

giphy2

Share this:

  • Email
  • Tweet
  • Share on Tumblr
  • More
  • Print
  • Pocket
  • WhatsApp

Like this:

Like Loading...

Share this:

  • Email
  • Tweet
  • Share on Tumblr
  • More
  • Print
  • Pocket
  • WhatsApp

Like this:

Like Loading...

My last cardiologist said my heart problems are due to the fact that I love too hard, but I disagreed and so I fired him. This has negatively impacted the performance of my Toyota Camry, because my last cardiologist was also my car mechanic.

2018/12/032018/12/03 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

giphy1

Share this:

  • Email
  • Tweet
  • Share on Tumblr
  • More
  • Print
  • Pocket
  • WhatsApp

Like this:

Like Loading...

Share this:

  • Email
  • Tweet
  • Share on Tumblr
  • More
  • Print
  • Pocket
  • WhatsApp

Like this:

Like Loading...

Why are you so weird? Why can’t you just be perfectly normal like me?

2018/11/302018/11/30 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

giphy43

Share this:

  • Email
  • Tweet
  • Share on Tumblr
  • More
  • Print
  • Pocket
  • WhatsApp

Like this:

Like Loading...

Share this:

  • Email
  • Tweet
  • Share on Tumblr
  • More
  • Print
  • Pocket
  • WhatsApp

Like this:

Like Loading...

I also took my pet shoes for a walk, but I didn’t wear them on my feet, because I’m not that kind of monster. No, I’m an entirely different kind of monster, the kind that wears a Bigfoot costume and is FOR HIRE, if you are a serious documentarian.

2018/10/152018/10/15 jarodkintz11 Comment

giphy4

Share this:

  • Email
  • Tweet
  • Share on Tumblr
  • More
  • Print
  • Pocket
  • WhatsApp

Like this:

Like Loading...

Share this:

  • Email
  • Tweet
  • Share on Tumblr
  • More
  • Print
  • Pocket
  • WhatsApp

Like this:

Like Loading...

The key to keeping your pet waterfall happy is feeding it Kool-Aid, and if you don’t want to turn your pet waterfall all red, as if it’s in a continual state of blushing, I recommend using the transparent flavor of Kool-Aid called CNN.

2018/09/282018/09/28 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

giphy23

Share this:

  • Email
  • Tweet
  • Share on Tumblr
  • More
  • Print
  • Pocket
  • WhatsApp

Like this:

Like Loading...

Share this:

  • Email
  • Tweet
  • Share on Tumblr
  • More
  • Print
  • Pocket
  • WhatsApp

Like this:

Like Loading...

Posts navigation

Older posts

tag cloud

Follow me on Twitter

My Tweets

Recent Posts

  • I’m with Smudge The Cat. You can take your hologram dancing to some other galaxy. This is a Holographic Zone only.
  • Nothing is going to save us all from drowning except for you. Yes, YOU! So I’m going to need you to not only work harder and longer, but on behalf of Mother Nature I’m going to ask you to be more charitable with your fake money.
  • I was just thinking to myself, “Branson doesn’t have enough obese 80-year-old tourists, and to really be vibrant into the future, we need MORE of those types of visitors.”
  • This happened to me once. It might have happened twice, but after we ate our shoes we were all still hungry, so I was forced to devour my co-explorers, who would not stop complaining during dinner.
  • I just read that McDonald’s is trying to create a chicken sandwich to rival the one served by Popeyes. If they can come up with a product that gets certain customers to stab each other over it, then I’m all for it.
Blog at WordPress.com.
Cancel
loading Cancel
Post was not sent - check your email addresses!
Email check failed, please try again
Sorry, your blog cannot share posts by email.
%d bloggers like this:
    %d bloggers like this:
      %d bloggers like this:
        %d bloggers like this:
          %d bloggers like this:
            %d bloggers like this:
              %d bloggers like this:
                %d bloggers like this:
                  %d bloggers like this:
                    %d bloggers like this:
                      %d bloggers like this: