There is a party tomorrow night. You should go. Oh, by the way, you’re not invited. Neither am I. That’s why you should tell me how it is, detailing the whole evening and event in a notebook that I’ll later read and relive while I sip coffee in bed.

2021/06/05 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

If McDonald’s paid $15 MILLION dollars an hour, I’d love to work there. But not for long, because are you crazy? Two hours of employment and then I’d ask my boss to throw me a retirement party.

2020/10/14 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

My only note for Branson’s Anthems of Rock is what I tell potential buyers at my Tupperware Parties: You can never have too much Meatloaf. It makes such perfect Leftovers that a whole show could be done from the classic love ballad that’s beloved by fans of all hearing ranges.

2020/09/06 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

Who hasn’t been there before, am I right? And since you have been there, can you give me the address? I’ve always wanted to cuddle with a pink cat.

2019/12/102019/12/10 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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A town’s business cycle is a dance, and for the party and prosperity to increase in intensity, you can’t be playing music from 60 years ago.

2019/10/032019/10/03 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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I’m now selling Modern Dance Moves in four sizes: Small, Medium, Large, and I’ve Gotta Pee. The latter also describes the exotic motion.

2019/02/202019/02/20 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

giphy-41

Next time you have a funeral, you should hire a better DJ. Also, the cheese dip tasted a little funky, like a 1970s disco hit, and I like my queso smoother, like love songs from the 80s.

2019/02/162019/02/16 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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This #sponsored #ad is brought to you by #KindArtZooJar. It’s the only Fashion House made entirely of cards, and that’s why they have all the deals.

2019/02/122019/02/12 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

giphy-25

The key to keeping your pet waterfall happy is feeding it Kool-Aid, and if you don’t want to turn your pet waterfall all red, as if it’s in a continual state of blushing, I recommend using the transparent flavor of Kool-Aid called CNN.

2018/09/282018/09/28 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

giphy23

America’s biggest export is war, which means we switched from making widgets to manufacturing death, so it’s not surprising that McDonald’s tastes like a coffin.

2018/07/15 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

Tag: party

There is a party tomorrow night. You should go. Oh, by the way, you’re not invited. Neither am I. That’s why you should tell me how it is, detailing the whole evening and event in a notebook that I’ll later read and relive while I sip coffee in bed.

Like this:

If McDonald’s paid $15 MILLION dollars an hour, I’d love to work there. But not for long, because are you crazy? Two hours of employment and then I’d ask my boss to throw me a retirement party.

Like this:

My only note for Branson’s Anthems of Rock is what I tell potential buyers at my Tupperware Parties: You can never have too much Meatloaf. It makes such perfect Leftovers that a whole show could be done from the classic love ballad that’s beloved by fans of all hearing ranges.

Like this:

Who hasn’t been there before, am I right? And since you have been there, can you give me the address? I’ve always wanted to cuddle with a pink cat.

Like this:

A town’s business cycle is a dance, and for the party and prosperity to increase in intensity, you can’t be playing music from 60 years ago.

Like this:

I’m now selling Modern Dance Moves in four sizes: Small, Medium, Large, and I’ve Gotta Pee. The latter also describes the exotic motion.

Like this:

Next time you have a funeral, you should hire a better DJ. Also, the cheese dip tasted a little funky, like a 1970s disco hit, and I like my queso smoother, like love songs from the 80s.

Like this:

This #sponsored #ad is brought to you by #KindArtZooJar. It’s the only Fashion House made entirely of cards, and that’s why they have all the deals.

Like this:

The key to keeping your pet waterfall happy is feeding it Kool-Aid, and if you don’t want to turn your pet waterfall all red, as if it’s in a continual state of blushing, I recommend using the transparent flavor of Kool-Aid called CNN.

Like this:

America’s biggest export is war, which means we switched from making widgets to manufacturing death, so it’s not surprising that McDonald’s tastes like a coffin.

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