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Tag: organic

Like a kangaroo chase in flavor format, monoatomic gold is also a white powder. I try to not mix up the two and mix in the pure white powder gold, because to any politician, that’s snortable money.

2020/12/22 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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If you’ve ever had my World Famous SwimmingBird Soup, you probably think it tastes like a kangaroo chase. You may wonder, “Is it organic?” The answer is YES! I use 100% REAL powdered kangaroo chase to flavor my soup.

2020/12/21 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Who said manufacturing in America is dead? We make all sorts of stuff. We make war, fake money, fake news, and fake food. We also make real food, too. BearPaw Duck Farm’s Organic Orange-legged Aquatic Birds are 100% factory FRESH. You can hardly taste machine!

2020/11/23 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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It seems like the sun is always shining on The Ozarks, even at night. That’s because this place is hidden and full of love, like a beating heart.

2020/05/062020/05/06 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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If you are what you eat, then my ducks are The Ozarks. That means my ducks are 100% Pure Romance.

2020/05/012020/05/01 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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I should combine a car bumper with a belt, for a fashion accessory that’s safe for office romances. (Powdered love poetry and water sold separately.)

2020/02/282020/02/28 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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If April in The Ozarks smells like 100% Pure Romance, it’s because we use the freshest organic love poetry. The earnest words of yearning are all locally grown right here in my heart.

2020/02/282020/02/28 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Lots of companies brag that they make their products with love, but with organic soap, I am really making it with love. What is a fragrance that triggers heart-fluttering nostalgia if not love?

2020/01/202020/01/20 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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If you thought bull riding was dangerous, you should try straddling a bucking cloud. I’ve never attempted something so crazy, because not only am I afraid of heights, but I’m also terrified of floating condensed water vapor.

2019/03/032019/03/03 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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We only have a finite amount of laughter in our lungs, and when we use it up, that’s it, we’re all Hillary Clinton supporters. But don’t be afraid. That’s why I’m now selling raw packets of laughter, all organic and ethically grown, for ONLY $19.95!

2019/02/132019/02/13 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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