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Perhaps a coffin maker is the one salesman who can’t entice customers with Buy One Get One FREE. Especially if that customer is single, because he’s divorced and broke, from paying a fancy wedding DJ.

2019/09/042019/09/04 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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My offer of FREE coffee cupcake refills applies to everyone except Wendell, who’s a java camel.

2019/03/062019/03/06 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Stop by The Shop and get your haircut, even if you have no hair. Right now bald men can SAVE 50% on any style, so long as it’s a flat top.

2019/02/022019/02/02 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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You could be who you were born to be. With my red clown noses FOR SALE, or FREE with select offers, you no longer have to wait around for Presidential Elections to let the world know who you really are deep inside.

2018/12/272018/12/27 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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  • Here’s an idea: You blame me and I’ll blame you. Then we can both join Howard Jones in singing, “No one is to blame.”
  • Everyone is getting crazier. And poorer. Which is making everyone even crazier.
  • I once wrote a 100,000-word book. But don’t worry, I managed to edit it down to just over one million words.
  • A hundred dollars used to have value. Now it has grown fat and worthless. Or has it grown so skinny as to be useless?
  • If I were the world’s richest man, I’d present myself as the world’s poorest, because I’d want people to want me for me. In fact, I’m so poor I want to be Guinness verified as The World’s Poorest—and I’m even willing to pay for the title (a bribe).
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