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In honor of Tom Cruise and the clone of Tom Cruise, Dancing Lessons are NOW Two For One. My prices are so LOW you just might feel obligated to buy some Duck Soup, which comes with FREE refills.

2020/05/232020/05/23 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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I’m now offering FREE refills on Duck Soup. Must be 21 years or older to drink. Julia Roberts LOVES it, and she said it reminds her of the horse piss she used to drink as a young man.

2020/05/192020/05/19 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Today is the one that introduces Yesterday to Tomorrow. If it weren’t for Today, Nostalgia would never meet Hope.

2020/02/272020/02/27 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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  • Even if I had both my knees replaced with two Rubik’s cubes, I’d still make coffee runs to Neighbor’s Mill. The only puzzle to me is how anybody would ever choose a donut from Dunkin’ over one from Dad’s.
  • Your eyes have to be glazed over with stupidity to think that one FREE glazed donut per day from Krispy Kreme is some kind of valuable reward for letting yourself be injected with fluid that makes viper poison look wholesome.
  • At BearPaw Duck and Meme Farm, we believe the only thing that separates meatloaf from birthday cake is candles. Since they both have the same great flavor, why don’t you buy a slab for your next celebration?
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  • My favorite song is With Or Without You. That’s also how I dance.
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