My favorite bird is Thanksgiving, and I eat it once a year twice, to celebrate being able to celebrate. I take absurdity very seriously, and I suggest you $19.95 while you can still afford it or before it melts into Leftover Meatloaf.

2019/10/162019/10/16 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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I used to think alligators were reptiles until I found out about guys like Henry Kissinger, Trump and Putin’s handler, and now I see that alligators are human by comparison. Though Kissinger has Kiss in his name, there is no love in him.

2019/10/162019/10/16 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Autumn leaves go from green to brown, though orange, and that’s a gradient that’s great in the beginning and middle, but sad at the end, like fading love. I wish we could omit winter and summer, and just have a SpringFall kind of romance.

2019/09/302019/09/30 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Guinness should give itself a world record for being the biggest Clown Show in this circus called Life.

2019/09/272019/09/27 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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In my Warehouse of Romance I specialize in selling only two precious items: Love and Leftover Meatloaf. Both are vintage 1980s, so get them while they’re still cold.

2019/09/262019/09/26 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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I really shouldn’t be giving relationship advice, because the longest relationship I’ve ever been in was just under a mile long.

2019/09/112019/09/11 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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A Woman Of The Future might try to insult me and say I make love like a robot, all mechanical and without feeling, but I’ll take offense to that, because my prices will be much more affordable.

2019/09/092019/09/09 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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These days, robots will do everything. They’ll do your job, they’ll take your paycheck, and they’ll even make love to you, for a price, which of course you can’t afford because a robot stole your income.

2019/09/092019/09/09 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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My heart pours forth, and if you pour a fifth, we can both drink and be merry.

2019/09/072019/09/07 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Our love is timeless, like a broken watch. Our relationship is like 3:33 24/7/365, and that’s why it feels so complete.

2019/09/062019/09/06 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Tag: love

My favorite bird is Thanksgiving, and I eat it once a year twice, to celebrate being able to celebrate. I take absurdity very seriously, and I suggest you $19.95 while you can still afford it or before it melts into Leftover Meatloaf.

Like this:

I used to think alligators were reptiles until I found out about guys like Henry Kissinger, Trump and Putin’s handler, and now I see that alligators are human by comparison. Though Kissinger has Kiss in his name, there is no love in him.

Like this:

Autumn leaves go from green to brown, though orange, and that’s a gradient that’s great in the beginning and middle, but sad at the end, like fading love. I wish we could omit winter and summer, and just have a SpringFall kind of romance.

Like this:

Guinness should give itself a world record for being the biggest Clown Show in this circus called Life.

Like this:

In my Warehouse of Romance I specialize in selling only two precious items: Love and Leftover Meatloaf. Both are vintage 1980s, so get them while they’re still cold.

Like this:

I really shouldn’t be giving relationship advice, because the longest relationship I’ve ever been in was just under a mile long.

Like this:

A Woman Of The Future might try to insult me and say I make love like a robot, all mechanical and without feeling, but I’ll take offense to that, because my prices will be much more affordable.

Like this:

These days, robots will do everything. They’ll do your job, they’ll take your paycheck, and they’ll even make love to you, for a price, which of course you can’t afford because a robot stole your income.

Like this:

My heart pours forth, and if you pour a fifth, we can both drink and be merry.

Like this:

Our love is timeless, like a broken watch. Our relationship is like 3:33 24/7/365, and that’s why it feels so complete.

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