If I gave birth to myself, like some kind of hermaphroditic worm, would I be entitled to FREE food? This is an important issue that NO Presidential candidate has EVER mentioned.

2020/03/132020/03/13 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

giphy-14

I once saw two old men about to get into a fistfight on the street, and I had to physically get in between them to stop them, because the crowd had just gathered and nobody had been able to place any bets yet.

2018/03/24 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

giphy14

Too bad you can’t actually wear your heart on your sleeve. Oh well, at least you can wear my heart on your shirt.

2018/01/03 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

giphy1

Buy it here

Love is all we really have, but love is all we really need—and it’s all anybody truly wants. The more you give, the more you get—and the more you have to give.

2018/01/02 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

giphy

If you step in a puddle, don’t be so dismissive of it, because it could be my love for you, as the whole place got flooded after you melted my heart. I should sell the whole experience to people who find places like Niagara Falls romantic.

2017/12/31 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

giphy27

I lined up seventeen people, each of whom only had a first name that was monosyllabic, and I arranged what would have been the most romantic haiku, if only one person didn’t feel lonely and without a partner.

2017/12/29 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

giphy25

Of all the things you have to sell, you should NEVER sell your love. No, you should offer it FOR LEASE. Ask me about my Romance Special that is customized just for you.

2017/12/29 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

giphy24

The only thing you should remember is that everything you do will be forgotten, except the moments where you gave love.

2017/12/182017/12/18 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

giphy11

The best thing about love is there are FREE refills—so long as your cup has a hole in the bottom and you’re not trying to keep it all for yourself.

Tag: love quote

If I gave birth to myself, like some kind of hermaphroditic worm, would I be entitled to FREE food? This is an important issue that NO Presidential candidate has EVER mentioned.

Like this:

I once saw two old men about to get into a fistfight on the street, and I had to physically get in between them to stop them, because the crowd had just gathered and nobody had been able to place any bets yet.

Like this:

Too bad you can’t actually wear your heart on your sleeve. Oh well, at least you can wear my heart on your shirt.

Like this:

Love is all we really have, but love is all we really need—and it’s all anybody truly wants. The more you give, the more you get—and the more you have to give.

Like this:

If you step in a puddle, don’t be so dismissive of it, because it could be my love for you, as the whole place got flooded after you melted my heart. I should sell the whole experience to people who find places like Niagara Falls romantic.

Like this:

I lined up seventeen people, each of whom only had a first name that was monosyllabic, and I arranged what would have been the most romantic haiku, if only one person didn’t feel lonely and without a partner.

Like this:

Of all the things you have to sell, you should NEVER sell your love. No, you should offer it FOR LEASE. Ask me about my Romance Special that is customized just for you.

Like this:

The only thing you should remember is that everything you do will be forgotten, except the moments where you gave love.

Like this:

The best thing about love is there are FREE refills—so long as your cup has a hole in the bottom and you’re not trying to keep it all for yourself.

Like this:

Wasting time is wasting love, because life is equally made up of both.

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this:

Share this:

Like this: