Tag: laugh
The only people who’ve ever died laughing are still alive to talk about it. That is, until NOW. I may have inadvertently created a device so funny it’s actually a Weapon of War. It’s so potent that FEMA wants to buy it, so they can re-label the deaths as being caused by Covid-19.
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I had Dr. Gigglebrooks run diagnostics on my proprietary torture device that measures the quantity of exhaled breath in authentic laughter, and the results are in: A Box of Laughter has 33.3% more FLAVOR than Canned Laughter.
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Have you ever told a joke with a punch line so naughty you have to whisper it? I did that today, only I shouted the ending, because with Forced Social Distancing, by the time my voice traveled and endured over the air to the receiving ear, it may have been nearly inaudible.
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After trying out hours and hours of original material, I can assure you that cats hate knock-knock jokes. To them, knocking is no joke, because if you’ve got knickknacks on a shelf, they’ll seriously knock them all off.
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Much like The Circus, politics is serious. It’s no laughing matter. If you don’t vote, some dead guy in Chicago will do it for you—twice.
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I take jokes very seriously. So seriously, in fact, that I never take jokes.
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They say laughter is the best medicine, and I believe it. That’s why I’m surprised The FDA hasn’t yet banned jokes and memes.
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The brain is in the body, and memories are in the brain. Are my memories therefore not physical extensions of me, and able to be frozen for all of eternity, so that someone in the future can dethaw them and laugh at all the jokes I once enjoyed?
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If you ever think you’re funny, just try your material on your cat, and then get back to writing, because you have work to do.
