Now that nobody has any money or job, maybe people would pay me to print them income. Buy a $100 dollar bill for ONLY $19.95—or Five For Fifty dollars. (Fake, fake, fake money not an acceptable form of payment for fake, fake money.)

2020/04/212020/04/21 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Oh, The Branson Missouri Chamber of Commerce is going to sunny Puerto Rico in the middle of dreary winter? Who is paying for their vacation that’s masquerading as philanthropic mission work?

2020/02/042020/02/04 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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The reason I make soap by hand is it’s cleaner than making it by foot. Plus, there are too many steps in the process of making things by foot, so I’ll leave that to the wineries.

2020/01/312020/01/31 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Next time a bicycle steals my monkey, I hope another floating head appears to offer emotional support. Maybe next time he’ll bring a matching and connected body, so he can chase down that bicycle thief—that thief of a bicycle.

2020/01/202020/01/20 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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I’d like to be mayor of Branson for just one day. That day would be yesterday, because I was sick, so I’d have called out of work, but also thanked The People for voting.

2020/01/012020/01/01 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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I have never made a cashier cry, but I have gotten into a shouting match with one, because he counted up 11 items to ring up, and he was in the 10 items or less line, but one product I was buying was Buy One, Get One FREE, so I argued Item 11 should be thought of as invisible.

2019/12/132019/12/13 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Where did the first half of my joke go? I don’t even remember how it goes, so I have no idea where it could have gone. Maybe it’s wandering around THE Ohio State University chasing the ehoes of laughter from the recent Charlie Kirk heckling.

2019/11/032019/11/03 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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From time to time I think about quitting my job. The first time I think about quitting is the moment I clock in to work, and the second time I think about quitting is one second later.

2019/10/162019/10/16 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

A uniform is a costume, and a $9/hour security guard might as well be wearing a Mickey Mouse outfit.

2019/09/302019/09/30 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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A Woman Of The Future might try to insult me and say I make love like a robot, all mechanical and without feeling, but I’ll take offense to that, because my prices will be much more affordable.

2019/09/092019/09/09 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Tag: job

Now that nobody has any money or job, maybe people would pay me to print them income. Buy a $100 dollar bill for ONLY $19.95—or Five For Fifty dollars. (Fake, fake, fake money not an acceptable form of payment for fake, fake money.)

Like this:

Oh, The Branson Missouri Chamber of Commerce is going to sunny Puerto Rico in the middle of dreary winter? Who is paying for their vacation that’s masquerading as philanthropic mission work?

Like this:

The reason I make soap by hand is it’s cleaner than making it by foot. Plus, there are too many steps in the process of making things by foot, so I’ll leave that to the wineries.

Like this:

Next time a bicycle steals my monkey, I hope another floating head appears to offer emotional support. Maybe next time he’ll bring a matching and connected body, so he can chase down that bicycle thief—that thief of a bicycle.

Like this:

I’d like to be mayor of Branson for just one day. That day would be yesterday, because I was sick, so I’d have called out of work, but also thanked The People for voting.

Like this:

I have never made a cashier cry, but I have gotten into a shouting match with one, because he counted up 11 items to ring up, and he was in the 10 items or less line, but one product I was buying was Buy One, Get One FREE, so I argued Item 11 should be thought of as invisible.

Like this:

Where did the first half of my joke go? I don’t even remember how it goes, so I have no idea where it could have gone. Maybe it’s wandering around THE Ohio State University chasing the ehoes of laughter from the recent Charlie Kirk heckling.

Like this:

From time to time I think about quitting my job. The first time I think about quitting is the moment I clock in to work, and the second time I think about quitting is one second later.

Like this:

A uniform is a costume, and a $9/hour security guard might as well be wearing a Mickey Mouse outfit.

Like this:

A Woman Of The Future might try to insult me and say I make love like a robot, all mechanical and without feeling, but I’ll take offense to that, because my prices will be much more affordable.

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