Gravy is my favorite sports drink. Try chugging it the next time you run so far your legs feel like mashed potatoes.

2020/09/18 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

My advice to you is if you feel like you’re losing, give yourself a pep talk. Be your own coach. How do you do that? For ONLY $19.95, I can coach you to be your own coach. Lessons even come with a FREE trophy!

2020/09/13 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

Nothing like a little controversy and conspiracy to drum up interest in a business. Speaking of drums, I’m starting a band, and Branson, Missouri—The Musician will be playing keytar.

2020/08/262020/08/26 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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“You break it, you buy it.” That retail maxim is what I told my cat. Well, he broke it. But he couldn’t buy it, because not only does he not have any money—he doesn’t even have any fake money (dollars).

2020/08/252020/08/25 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

giphy-18

One day soon this new pond will be full of water, have Kelly-green clover growing all around, and have white ducks swimming in it. While you relax and enjoy the scenery, there’s even a special place to hold your beer. It’s called your stomach.

2020/08/012020/08/01 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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The only way to change oppression in society is to VOTE. If you’ll recall, that’s how America gained its Independence from England in 1776. If our brave Founding Fathers hadn’t VOTED their way to FREEDOM, we’d all still be speaking English.

2020/08/012020/08/01 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

giphy-2

If it weren’t for emojis, some people would have nothing to say. So if you’ve got nothing to say, why not say two things at once?

2020/04/272020/04/27 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

I used to own a dollar. Well, The Banksters let me pretend I owned a dollar. That was yesterday. Now that dollar is even thinner than it was 24 hours ago, and soon it will be so thin it won’t be paper, it will be entirely digital.

2020/04/272020/04/27 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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If you can swallow all their lies, and the blatant and obvious fraud, without tasting the absolute farce, then surely you can swallow dog poop. FREE samples this November!

2020/04/112020/04/11 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

For you, the buyer, the best part about FREE refills is the price. Now ONLY $19.95! (Plus shipping and fondling.)

2020/03/152020/03/15 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Tag: humor

Gravy is my favorite sports drink. Try chugging it the next time you run so far your legs feel like mashed potatoes.

Like this:

My advice to you is if you feel like you’re losing, give yourself a pep talk. Be your own coach. How do you do that? For ONLY $19.95, I can coach you to be your own coach. Lessons even come with a FREE trophy!

Like this:

Nothing like a little controversy and conspiracy to drum up interest in a business. Speaking of drums, I’m starting a band, and Branson, Missouri—The Musician will be playing keytar.

Like this:

“You break it, you buy it.” That retail maxim is what I told my cat. Well, he broke it. But he couldn’t buy it, because not only does he not have any money—he doesn’t even have any fake money (dollars).

Like this:

One day soon this new pond will be full of water, have Kelly-green clover growing all around, and have white ducks swimming in it. While you relax and enjoy the scenery, there’s even a special place to hold your beer. It’s called your stomach.

Like this:

The only way to change oppression in society is to VOTE. If you’ll recall, that’s how America gained its Independence from England in 1776. If our brave Founding Fathers hadn’t VOTED their way to FREEDOM, we’d all still be speaking English.

Like this:

If it weren’t for emojis, some people would have nothing to say. So if you’ve got nothing to say, why not say two things at once?

Like this:

I used to own a dollar. Well, The Banksters let me pretend I owned a dollar. That was yesterday. Now that dollar is even thinner than it was 24 hours ago, and soon it will be so thin it won’t be paper, it will be entirely digital.

Like this:

If you can swallow all their lies, and the blatant and obvious fraud, without tasting the absolute farce, then surely you can swallow dog poop. FREE samples this November!

Like this:

For you, the buyer, the best part about FREE refills is the price. Now ONLY $19.95! (Plus shipping and fondling.)

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