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Tag: harrison arkansas

Leonardo’s is right across the street from McDonald’s. I know, a tough choice, right? Do I want to eat ground-up runaway teens marketed and sold as “hamburgers,” or do I want to eat tasty local Italian food?

2021/09/09 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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I now offer a vegan menu option for all those eaters whose stomachs are bigger than their brains. Order your meatless duck today and enjoy the wonderful flavor of soy.

2021/06/02 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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On a Sleepy to Coffee Scale, right now I’m Pure Insomnia. I’m talking about Alaska at midnight kind of awake.

2021/05/28 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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You are what you drink, even if the largest volume of fluid is music streaming in through your ears. Playing a song on repeat is like enjoying FREE refills on coffee.

2021/05/26 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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The main ingredient in a baseball card is cardboard. That makes its taste indistinguishable from Pizza Hut’s crust.

2021/05/26 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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As far as musicians go, Seal is my favorite. But not the Seal that looks like his face has been gored by a Great White Shark who sang in the 90s. No, I’m talking about the watery JazzSax virtuoso.

2021/05/21 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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On a scale of One to Bob Ross Painting, Neighbor’s Mill is pure Bob Ross. Makes me want to pet a baby deer and talk about happy trees.

2021/05/21 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Let’s meet for coffee and talk about how we’re going to take over the world, and then when the coffee wears off let’s talk about taking a nap.

2021/04/27 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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To help my ducks improve their swimming ability, I remixed Mozart with whale sounds, and I pulse the music through their SplashTub. If you’d like to see and hear the performance, tickets are ten bucks a person, or five bucks per half-person.

2021/04/27 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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I have the rarest of all sportsball cards. I have a one-of-one misprint. It’s supposed to be John Gochnaur, but the picture and name say Babe Ruth, whoever that is. It’s also autographed Tom Brady, and you know it’s authentic because I signed it myself. Now FOR SALE in Dogecoin.

2021/04/22 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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