Sure, Bill Gates is one of the publicized richest men in the world, and he can afford to purchase SwimmingBird Pie, but I think you’ll agree that sometimes FREE just tastes better. Look how happy he is that I shared my world-famous pie with him. He can’t believe I’m so generous.

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On wealth: The way The Federal Reserve is printing dollars, it won’t be too long before I’m a millionaire. I’ll be so rich I’m poor, because that one million dollars that used to take a lifetime of work to earn will only buy me a cheeseburger. But not a double cheeseburger.

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