Tag: fight
Not only do I sell Cheeseburger Milkshakes, but I also sell oven mitts shaped like boxing gloves, so you can more stylishly fight forest fires. You just might wish you had a pair the next time a forest fire comes knocking on your door, after avoiding trees and shrubs and grass.
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I regret to inform you that I have just SOLD OUT of grandmothers, but in stock I do have Talking Raisins In A Box. They’re not quite as grumpy, but they are just as wrinkly.
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Some people sleep with a gun under their pillow, and that is offensive. In an effort to ban all Objects Of Violence, I propose banning pillows, because they are the root cause of millions of fights, and without them, we’d have a more peaceful society. I hope you groggily agree.
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A rocking chair puts me in a quandary, because it moves without ever going anywhere. In that way, it’s like True Love, because it moves you, but never leaves you or lets you leave.
jarodkintz.com 