At BearPaw Duck and Meme Farm, we recognize that low prices shit on quality. I’m talking about a nasty dump in a mop bucket kind of way, which is why we stay clean of gimmicky deals.

2021/07/05 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

I now offer a vegan menu option for all those eaters whose stomachs are bigger than their brains. Order your meatless duck today and enjoy the wonderful flavor of soy.

2021/06/02 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

At BearPaw Duck Farm, our customer service representatives work 24/7 to make sure you are satisfied. If nobody answers your call within five rings, like The Olympics logo, call back in four years.

2020/11/15 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

I don’t know who this woman is, but she deserves a trophy for her ability to show off a trophy. It’s like a win-win, and that’s the kind of thing I’d like to offer FOR SALE for ONLY $19.95.

2020/08/012020/08/01 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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No bears were injured in the making of this GIF. Sadly, one little girl did start crying. But she stopped once I gave her a Frozen Duck Soup Popsicle, which is now FOR SALE and available in four fun flavors that all taste the same!

2020/05/232020/05/23 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Taste the interdimensional. Just add water—from the second heaven.

2020/04/212020/04/21 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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The only people who’ve ever died laughing are still alive to talk about it. That is, until NOW. I may have inadvertently created a device so funny it’s actually a Weapon of War. It’s so potent that FEMA wants to buy it, so they can re-label the deaths as being caused by Covid-19.

2020/04/112020/04/11 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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What does it mean to “shop”? If it’s simply you spending money, then yes, you can shop this deal. If it means you spending money in return for what you expected to buy, then no, this SALE is not for you.

2020/03/032020/03/03 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Have you considered using Leftover Meatloaf as a sponge to scrub your naked body in the shower? It’s all I seem to think about these days.

2019/08/302019/08/30 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Playing around in Adobe Animate, I wanted to make a heart-to-heart symbol that morphed from an actual heart to the heart symbol. I think it turned out lovely.

2018/02/222018/02/22 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Tag: fake commercial

At BearPaw Duck and Meme Farm, we recognize that low prices shit on quality. I’m talking about a nasty dump in a mop bucket kind of way, which is why we stay clean of gimmicky deals.

Like this:

I now offer a vegan menu option for all those eaters whose stomachs are bigger than their brains. Order your meatless duck today and enjoy the wonderful flavor of soy.

Like this:

At BearPaw Duck Farm, our customer service representatives work 24/7 to make sure you are satisfied. If nobody answers your call within five rings, like The Olympics logo, call back in four years.

Like this:

I don’t know who this woman is, but she deserves a trophy for her ability to show off a trophy. It’s like a win-win, and that’s the kind of thing I’d like to offer FOR SALE for ONLY $19.95.

Like this:

No bears were injured in the making of this GIF. Sadly, one little girl did start crying. But she stopped once I gave her a Frozen Duck Soup Popsicle, which is now FOR SALE and available in four fun flavors that all taste the same!

Like this:

Taste the interdimensional. Just add water—from the second heaven.

Like this:

The only people who’ve ever died laughing are still alive to talk about it. That is, until NOW. I may have inadvertently created a device so funny it’s actually a Weapon of War. It’s so potent that FEMA wants to buy it, so they can re-label the deaths as being caused by Covid-19.

Like this:

What does it mean to “shop”? If it’s simply you spending money, then yes, you can shop this deal. If it means you spending money in return for what you expected to buy, then no, this SALE is not for you.

Like this:

Have you considered using Leftover Meatloaf as a sponge to scrub your naked body in the shower? It’s all I seem to think about these days.

Like this:

Playing around in Adobe Animate, I wanted to make a heart-to-heart symbol that morphed from an actual heart to the heart symbol. I think it turned out lovely.

Like this:

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