Tag: entrepreneur
If my goal is to get noticed by my Love Interest, will making weird memes get me affection? No, just look at Mike Bloomberg. No, look down. Way down. There he is, all the way down at 5’4″.
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A bar of soap on a stick is a lollipop of sorts—if your kid has a filthy mouth. If your son ever says something like, “Taxes are the price we pay to live in a civilized society,” you should wash his mouth out immediately.
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The waves danced across Lake Taneycomo like liquid ballerinas, and they paused their performance to pass me a soggy scroll that had this scrawled, “Tourists will trade their livelihoods to be entertained.” So I turned off the blaring pirouette music and let them rest their feet.
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My favorite bird is Thanksgiving, and I eat it once a year twice, to celebrate being able to celebrate. I take absurdity very seriously, and I suggest you $19.95 while you can still afford it or before it melts into Leftover Meatloaf.
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A pulled tooth is heart-shaped, if yanked with love. That’s what I do—for ONLY $19.95!
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Neiman Marcus will be out of business by next year, unlike me, who was never IN business to begin with, so I can make entrepreneurial missteps and then repackage them as Dancing Lessons.
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My soup is 100% Ranch FREE, which is why when you buy it I include FREE Ranch. (Ranch sold separately.)
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Yesterday, today, and tomorrow are so fluid that I’m now selling them in one Extra Large cup, and if you buy within the next 24 hours I’ll even include FREE Leftover Meatloaf.
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Come and enjoy Branson’s NEWEST attraction. If you can’t find the ride, and have no idea where to look, congratulations, you have already started The Helen Keller Experience!
