I used to give swimming lessons to dolphins, and I can tell you that this mammal has the aquatic talent of tumbleweed in the desert. I also once raced Michael Phelps and won. Not THE Michael Phelps, but A Michael Phelps, though I still think it’s a trophy-worthy accomplishment.

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Powdered Rose Substitute doesn’t have The Gift of Flight, but butterfly wings on a dolphin wouldn’t make good swimming fins, if you know what I mean. What I’m trying to say is HURRY UP AND BUY! The SALE ends when Bob Ross finishes the masterpiece he’s painting now in the past.

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