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A woman just asked me if I’m good in bed, and I replied, “No, I’m a terrible sleeper. In fact, I’m so inefficient that it takes me twelve hours to do what the average person can do in eight.”

2019/10/082019/10/08 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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I’m writing a history book. It’s about yesterday. It goes ON SALE tomorrow for $19.95, and it includes FREE Leftover Meatloaf from antiquity. Sources tell me it tastes like The French Revolution.

2019/08/282019/08/28 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Romance is everywhere you look. So, what are you waiting for? Take off your blindfold!

2017/10/31 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Recent Posts

Here’s an idea: You blame me and I’ll blame you. Then we can both join Howard Jones in singing, “No one is to blame.”
Everyone is getting crazier. And poorer. Which is making everyone even crazier.
I once wrote a 100,000-word book. But don’t worry, I managed to edit it down to just over one million words.
A hundred dollars used to have value. Now it has grown fat and worthless. Or has it grown so skinny as to be useless?
If I were the world’s richest man, I’d present myself as the world’s poorest, because I’d want people to want me for me. In fact, I’m so poor I want to be Guinness verified as The World’s Poorest—and I’m even willing to pay for the title (a bribe).

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