Clowns are to be taken more seriously than mainstream news. But clowns are not to be taken. Put them back or pay for them—or ask the person you took them from to pay for them in a large quantity of small, unmarked bills stacked in a briefcase and left in a prearranged location.

2020/05/192020/05/19 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Being so good at math now is surprising, because I didn’t learn to count until the 7th grade. Or was it the 8th? I get those two numbers mixed up.

2020/03/122020/03/12 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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You plant a tree to have something to leave behind, like a monkey in a bathtub. This #SponsoredAd was brought to you by April in The Ozarks.

2020/02/282020/02/28 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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After trying out hours and hours of original material, I can assure you that cats hate knock-knock jokes. To them, knocking is no joke, because if you’ve got knickknacks on a shelf, they’ll seriously knock them all off.

2020/02/272020/02/27 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Please pray for me, and wipe your hands on my product, so it gets your signature scent, and can pulse out Buy Signals to you. $19.95 feels like a mild electrical shock similar to getting struck by lightning.

2020/01/012020/01/01 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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If history repeats itself, endlessly looping, then what better way to record and display the data than in GIF format? A song’s chorus is the hook that snags a listener’s fish-like ears. People respond favorably to repetition. People respond favorably to repetition.

2019/12/072019/12/07 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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I make love like I make coffee. That’s why if you buy right now, you get FREE refills for life. (Limited to one customer only. Promotion not valid in the following states: Alaska and Hawaii.)

2019/10/312019/10/31 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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A parrot will say whatever you tell it to say. If you don’t believe me, just go try talking to a CNN viewer.

2019/10/312019/10/31 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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You don’t have to be a gumshoe, or have gum on your shoe, to appreciate my Israel did 9/11-flavored gum, but once you experience this INCREDIBLE taste, you’ll want to start investigating The Truth.

2019/07/302019/07/30 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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You can afford to sell at 50% off when you have a whole warehouse full of the stuff, like I do.

2019/02/192019/02/19 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Tag: dank memes

Clowns are to be taken more seriously than mainstream news. But clowns are not to be taken. Put them back or pay for them—or ask the person you took them from to pay for them in a large quantity of small, unmarked bills stacked in a briefcase and left in a prearranged location.

Like this:

Being so good at math now is surprising, because I didn’t learn to count until the 7th grade. Or was it the 8th? I get those two numbers mixed up.

Like this:

You plant a tree to have something to leave behind, like a monkey in a bathtub. This #SponsoredAd was brought to you by April in The Ozarks.

Like this:

After trying out hours and hours of original material, I can assure you that cats hate knock-knock jokes. To them, knocking is no joke, because if you’ve got knickknacks on a shelf, they’ll seriously knock them all off.

Like this:

Please pray for me, and wipe your hands on my product, so it gets your signature scent, and can pulse out Buy Signals to you. $19.95 feels like a mild electrical shock similar to getting struck by lightning.

Like this:

If history repeats itself, endlessly looping, then what better way to record and display the data than in GIF format? A song’s chorus is the hook that snags a listener’s fish-like ears. People respond favorably to repetition. People respond favorably to repetition.

Like this:

I make love like I make coffee. That’s why if you buy right now, you get FREE refills for life. (Limited to one customer only. Promotion not valid in the following states: Alaska and Hawaii.)

Like this:

A parrot will say whatever you tell it to say. If you don’t believe me, just go try talking to a CNN viewer.

Like this:

You don’t have to be a gumshoe, or have gum on your shoe, to appreciate my Israel did 9/11-flavored gum, but once you experience this INCREDIBLE taste, you’ll want to start investigating The Truth.

Like this:

You can afford to sell at 50% off when you have a whole warehouse full of the stuff, like I do.

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