I make love like I make coffee. Actually, Jo made it for me today, twice, which is why it was so good, and why it costs me two bucks. But at least she gave me FREE refills. For a good time, visit Precision Coffee.

2020/09/13 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

When you act NOW, you also receive a FREE copy of my newest book: “How to put out riot fires with your naked body.” The book itself is burnable, and should altogether be banned by The Government.

2020/06/122020/06/12 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Time is money, and it’s now ON SALE. 60 seconds for 100 pennies. NO Senior Discounts!

2020/05/232020/05/23 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Flamingos are pink giraffe ducks. That’s not just a fact—it’s also the promo code for your FREE tour of BearPaw Albino Horseneck Flamingo Farm.

2020/05/092020/05/09 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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My new coffee is now 1980s flavored. It was inspired by Branson, Missouri’s love obsession with the year 1991, combined with the letter Q. You can’t say you get no respect, because you get FREE refills right up to 1990.

2020/05/06 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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For you, the buyer, the best part about FREE refills is the price. Now ONLY $19.95! (Plus shipping and fondling.)

2020/03/152020/03/15 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Today is the one that introduces Yesterday to Tomorrow. If it weren’t for Today, Nostalgia would never meet Hope.

2020/02/272020/02/27 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

Just as Austin makes Texas even cooler, Austin makes Branson even cooler. The first is a city, and the second is the owner of Expresso Branson.

2020/02/272020/02/27 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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At April in The Ozarks, we try to be relatable, like an orphan at a family reunion. You should try the meatloaf. It tastes like 1991.

2020/02/242020/02/24 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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The only voting I do is with my wallet. When I buy This, I’m voting against That and vice reversa. That’s the only real political power we have.

2020/02/232020/02/23 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Tag: coffee

I make love like I make coffee. Actually, Jo made it for me today, twice, which is why it was so good, and why it costs me two bucks. But at least she gave me FREE refills. For a good time, visit Precision Coffee.

Like this:

When you act NOW, you also receive a FREE copy of my newest book: “How to put out riot fires with your naked body.” The book itself is burnable, and should altogether be banned by The Government.

Like this:

Time is money, and it’s now ON SALE. 60 seconds for 100 pennies. NO Senior Discounts!

Like this:

My new coffee is now 1980s flavored. It was inspired by Branson, Missouri’s love obsession with the year 1991, combined with the letter Q. You can’t say you get no respect, because you get FREE refills right up to 1990.

Like this:

For you, the buyer, the best part about FREE refills is the price. Now ONLY $19.95! (Plus shipping and fondling.)

Like this:

Today is the one that introduces Yesterday to Tomorrow. If it weren’t for Today, Nostalgia would never meet Hope.

Like this:

Just as Austin makes Texas even cooler, Austin makes Branson even cooler. The first is a city, and the second is the owner of Expresso Branson.

Like this:

At April in The Ozarks, we try to be relatable, like an orphan at a family reunion. You should try the meatloaf. It tastes like 1991.

Like this:

The only voting I do is with my wallet. When I buy This, I’m voting against That and vice reversa. That’s the only real political power we have.

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