Tag: branson missouri
My new coffee is now 1980s flavored. It was inspired by Branson, Missouri’s love obsession with the year 1991, combined with the letter Q. You can’t say you get no respect, because you get FREE refills right up to 1990.
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I wanna go some place where The Dollar still has value, which is why for my 2020 summer vacation, I plan to spend it in 1991. That’s right, I’m going to Branson!
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Sorry folks, Branson is CLOSED for cleaning. We apologize for the inconvenience. If you’ll take a seat on the hard, wooden bench, we should be open again by the year 2030.
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Hand fishing in Branson is now FREE! Tickets are ONLY $19.95! And if you buy NOW, I’ll even include a complimentary dictionary.
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First Disneyland temporarily closed, and I wonder if next The Circus will be permanently shut down. Oh, it would be a shame if Branson abolished The Chamber of Commerce.
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Laws are written, and laws are re-written. I can’t believe I still got a speeding ticket after explaining to the cop that where I’m from, the year 2244, the Speed Limit is 88 miles per hour, which is exactly how fast I was going when I passed by his radar gun.
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How can I convey how much conveyor belts in factories are needed when a town’s only industry is tourism? If you want to make progress, you have to actually make something.
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Right now The People of Branson are broke, but soon they’ll be broken. The town has one industry, tourism, and is wholly dependent on people having discretionary income for vacation, and that economic model is at odds with a fiat currency in its late stage.
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Branson’s got more waterfalls per square mile than any other shape of measuring landmass. Next time, try circles! (Waterproof sticks sold separately.)
