You should be proactive and call BearPaw Duck and Meme Farm BEFORE something breaks on your car. That way we can come out and make sure something needs to get fixed.
I now offer a vegan menu option for all those eaters whose stomachs are bigger than their brains. Order your meatless duck today and enjoy the wonderful flavor of soy.
I like my breakfast burritos at 7 PM, because I get out of bed 60 minutes earlier—and a full twelve hours before lazy roosters wake up. Do you slumber at midnight? What are you doing sleeping your life away?
I love the sound of fall leaves crunching under my feet as I walk on them. But wait, those are potato chips, my football helmet is full of nacho cheese, and this is winter. Shop #BearPawDuckAndMemeFarm for a smorgasbord of assorted tasty ear treats.
My cousin doesn’t know my name, so he calls me Marie The 13th. I told him, “Please, call me Mr. The 13th. Marie is my father’s name.” Family reunions are always awkward because nobody there is related to me. Still, I give them all discounts on BearPaw Duck Farm omelets.
I drink every ounce of beer like it’s a liquid gold coin. Craig at Cheeky Monkey made me feel like a Swiss vault—and at piggybank prices.
Buy One Wheel, Get One FREE. You get TWO unicycles for the price of ONE bicycle. And if you act NOW, I’ll even include Frozen Duck Soup On A Stick for FREE.
I’d recommend waiting an hour after eating and drinking before going swimming—unless you’re combining eating and drinking by enjoying a beer made by BearPaw Duck Farm. FREE refills after 11:59 PM and before midnight.
Besides being Bigfoot FOR HIRE, I’m also the Chris Evans of Crisis Actors. You can see I’m good, because you don’t even know that you’ve seen me. But you have seen me. Recently I played The Dummy whose life was being saved by TikTok dancers dressed up like nurses and doctors.