Tag: bicycle
Some people put more thought into what kind of car to buy than what kind of mate to marry. I think that’s foolish, because I’m a bicycle salesman. Well, I actually only have one bicycle to sell, and I stole it, which is what makes it so profitable.
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Next time a bicycle steals my monkey, I hope another floating head appears to offer emotional support. Maybe next time he’ll bring a matching and connected body, so he can chase down that bicycle thief—that thief of a bicycle.
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You can afford to sell at 50% off when you have a whole warehouse full of the stuff, like I do.
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After Wendell’s daring performance, if he should somehow survive, and that is a big IF for such a reasonable ticket price, join us as Wendell leads us in The Search for The Lost Treasure of Jesse James. Metal detector rentals ONLY $19.95.
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If you buy enough fries from me, you can become your own bicycle ramp, and then you can actively become part of another person’s dream. Ask me about Bulk Discounts.
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I used to be a bicycle salesman, with my main promotion being Buy One Tire, Get One FREE. Now I sell Unicycles, and when you buy one you get a FREE handlebar mustache.
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When I go jogging at night, and it’s pitch black, my shadow always takes the opportunity to run off and go grab a beer, because he thinks his actions are camouflaged and invisible to me. But when he gets fat and no longer mirrors my body, he’ll bring shame to The Shadow Community.
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I’ll be hosting the first ever International Nonsense Conference. It will be held on page 22 of your third-grade math book. You don’t want to miss it!
