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Tag: bible

With The Bible, when you read you eat, and it’s the food that nourishes your spirit. It’s good for your body to fast, but it’s not healthy to starve your True Self of The Holy Ghost.

2021/05/04 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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A plague of black vultures has arrived to consume death and to disperse the stench of rotting corpses, and Satan’s minions have decreed it illegal to kill them. This is just one early sign that America is now under God’s judgment.

2020/12/10 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Have I ever driven a forklift before? Has The Pope ever read The Bible? The answer is no, but that doesn’t mean I’m not the best man for the job. How do I know I’m the best? Because I bought a trophy that says exactly that and corroborates my claim.

2020/10/29 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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You can’t call yourself a Christian and then VOTE in an anti-Christ system. Some of you spend so much time watching football that you now read at the same level as the average NFL player, but The Bible and salvation don’t care about your second-grade intellectual capacity.

2020/09/30 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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The best way to watch sports is while reading a book with the TV off. Start with The Bible.

2020/09/13 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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I’m shocked to learn I’ve been saying the word joke wrong. My whole life I thought it was pronounced joke, like choke with a j, but it turns out it’s actually spoken as MAGA.

2020/06/122020/06/12 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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The People are correct when they say The Government is the answer. Too bad they get the question wrong. The correct question that matches that answer is: Who should you listen to if you want to go to hell?

2020/04/112020/04/11 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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New Christianity has a NEW bible. It’s called The Talmud. It’s a real page-turner. If you hate your life now, wait until you read what The Self-Chosenites think about you!

2020/03/262020/03/26 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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Jacob, the son of Isaac, wasn’t the only man to wrestle with a being of light. I have grappled with a hologram, and I was victorious. A holographic entity is one FREE refill beyond gender fluid.

2020/01/122020/01/12 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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A town’s business cycle is a dance, and for the party and prosperity to increase in intensity, you can’t be playing music from 60 years ago.

2019/10/032019/10/03 jarodkintz1Leave a comment

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