The best part about offering an inferior product FOR SALE, is the satisfaction I get from knowing I’m saving people money. That’s the kind of thing that builds lasting business relationships.
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If you’re a bank robber, the cops will hunt you down. But if you’re a bank robber, the cops will provide you with an armed escort and protect you. The Yellow Vest Movement is all about The People standing up against the bank robbers who print fake money and destroy real lives.
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I just ordered some fresh rockets from NASA, which was probably unwise, because it guarantees sales will never be out of this world.
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If you buy enough fries from me, you can become your own bicycle ramp, and then you can actively become part of another person’s dream. Ask me about Bulk Discounts.
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I sell Sex Appeal In A Cup in small, medium, and large sizes. The cups are identical in volume, and the refills are FREE, but they’ll make your lover thirst for you like coffee.
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I can teach you how to dance, but I can’t teach you how to be sexy. Well, I mean I can, but it’ll cost you an additional $19.95.
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After you buy my Dancing Lessons In A Box, and before you leave a one-star product review on Amazon, you should remember that the box only appears to be empty, but it is in fact full of my love for you.
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My Dancing Lessons In A Box are completely SOLD OUT. I’m waiting for more cardboard to come in, so you should Pre-Order yours today.
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I’m all about saving you money. But I can’t save you money until you spend money, so find out now by buying. What are you waiting for? You can’t shop when you’re dead, even if you can vote for Hillary Clinton.
