It’s like my good friend Elon Musk said, “If you don’t shop at BearPaw Duck & Meme Farm, you’ll wish you were born as a hologram, because I’m going to Mars to be with other beings of light, so go buy a Tesla and starve.”
BearPaw Duck & Meme Farm now offers FREE refills on T-shirts. Buy one shirt, and fill it as many times as you’d like.
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Look up BearPaw Duck & Meme Farm. We’re in The Phone Book. I know, because I actually found a copy and scribbled our contact information inside. Business is about to go the way of NASA’s 1986 Challenger rocket.
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I have three ducks FOR SALE. They are named Steve, Martin, and Steve Martin. When you buy Steve and Martin, you get Steve Martin for FREE. (Steve Martin sold separately.)
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There are only two things in this world that make me cry: The heroism displayed by Congress on January 6th, 2021—and chopping up onions. It just so happens that BOTH are used in BearPaw Duck Farm’s NEW SwimmingBird Soup recipe.
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You’ll taste the pow of black powder like a gunshot in your mouth. That’s the kind of explosive flavor provided by my powerful Duck Soup.
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No live bats are injured in the making of my Duck Soup. To mimic the flavor of FlyingMouse, I use black powdered CaveBird of the variety that used to be shoved inside of muskets to make them fire.
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When math and English have sex, the baby is Algebra. I’m just glad I’m not the father, but to be honest, I was a little concerned.
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I know A LOT about money. Not from, you know, having any, but more from reading about it.
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I once had a pet tornado, but Kansas asked me to stop walking it on its lawn. I was so offended that I spilled myself on my lunch and stained by BBQ sauce with my T-shirt. This design has the same fighting twist as my old cuddling companion, and is now FOR SALE.
