Well, the good news is I know for sure I am not God, but the bad news is I have a water leak that has flooded my basement, and I need to call an emergency plumber.
Sure, my basement now looks like something out of Genesis that Noah would surely recognize, but I am not an emergency plumber.
Heck, I’m not even a handyman, so I don’t know whether my pipes need a good drain cleaning, or whether my decision to not hire an emergency plumber, or a plumber with any sort of experience at all, to install copper pipes and instead me buying PVC pipes from Lowes and watching one YouTube video one time before installing them was the worst idea ever.
I’ll bet emergency plumbers make a fortune off of guys like me, guys with water leaks who are forced to pay whatever it costs to stop the damage from rising.
It’s after ten at night, so I hope there is 24 hour plumbing or some kind of plumbing repair service that deals with idiots like me at all hours.
I’ll bet 24 hour plumbing companies make much more money, because if a customer is calling in the middle of the night, then it’s an emergency, and that means that customer is willing to pay whatever price the plumbing repair service is wanting to charge.
Makes me want to start up a plumbing repair service, or even an excevating services business that caters to do-it-all know-nothings like me.
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Published by jarodkintz1
A lot of people want to know about Jarod Kintz. Most of these people just want to know where they can find him so they can get their money back, but there are a few people who really want to know more about him, other than what they can decipher through his writings. Well, here are a few facts about Jarod for all you curious people out there.
-Jarod often finds himself in a quandary over the meaning of life. Sometimes, like after he saw a pack of porcupines get run over by a truck, he feels the pointlessness of it all, and wonders how God could let such a thing happen to a new set of tires.
-Jarod likes spending his weekends making cardboard houses for homeless people to live in, although he just hates asking to borrow their living rooms when he needs to move some stuff.
-Jarod likes to credit all his success to a statement one of his early college professors, Dr. Franzenboebowitz, who said, “Whether you think you can or think you can’t, either way you’re still a retard.”
-After reading “The Art of War” by both Machiavelli and Sun Tzu, Jarod was heard saying, “I think both authors are so serious, and they could have greatly benefited from the use of my Binary Anal Defibrillator.” Consequently, he also feels this way about Nietzsche, Tolstoy, Dostoevsky, and Allen Ginsberg (though for much different reasons).
-Jarod divides his time evenly between an abacus and one of those clever early 90s calculator watches.
-Jarod once wrote a screenplay that ended with the main character crying in the rain screaming, “Curdled Milk!” Jarod figured that that was the ideal way to end a movie, because that way nobody could spoil the ending, since it had already gone bad anyway.
-Jarod is excited that you have read this far, and would be greatly honored if you would follow the following link to Amazon.com to check out some more of his Random Thoughts for only .99 cents
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