Remember when we made love in the rain? You asked me to bring protection, and I brought a windshield wiper. That was my first time. I had never driven in the rain before that. I didn’t even own a car. I was saving up money and buying car parts one at a time until I had the whole thing. I didn’t even have a windshield yet, just the wiper. That was the first thing I bought. I was so proud of myself. Rain or shine, I carried that wiper with me everywhere I went. Though it works in a car, it doesn’t really work as well as an umbrella when you’re swinging it above your head in a sudden downpour.